The Dumbest Thing I’ve Ever Done Part 1

Part I of III
Part II || Part III

Actually, I’d just as soon not talk about it. It's a bit embarrassing. There may be a catharsis in the telling, and perhaps a description of the journey that preceded the "Dumb Thing" will be useful to those interested in Costa Rica as a vacation spot, or as a place to live. So, I'll tell the tale, but you, dear reader, are going to have to get to the end to discover the really dumb thing.

My daughter recently graduated from the highly acclaimed school of massage up in Samara, Guanacaste Province, Costa Rica. 4 months of super-intensive schooling in anatomy and the various techniques for massaging that anatomy, all of which culminated in a graduation ceremony in a very remote, seaside resort just south of Samara called Punta Islita. I set off from Uvita, which is south of Dominical by about 12 minutes, and south of Manuel Antonio by about an hour and forty five minutes, and south of Samara by about 6 hours, just so you can get your orientation.

Uvita is situated on the Pacific side of Costa Rica, and Samara is also, but it’s out on the Nicoya Peninsula, which involves either driving around the inlet that forms the peninsula, or you can take a ferry across the bay, or you can drive a little further up and drive across the bridge that is known as “El Puente de la Amistad” which is also known as “The Taiwan Bridge”, since it was donated by Taiwan to Costa Rica. So, I took off at 5:00 AM. I had to take a quick jaunt up to San Isidro since I had left some gifts up there that I really bad wanted to be able to give to my family. We hadn’t all been together as a family for about a year, so it was to be quite the special occasion. My little detour up to San Isidro would add about an hour and a half to my trip, but such is family life. Besides, the early morning drive to San Isidro was breathtakingly beautiful.

When I returned from San Isidro, I headed northward towards Quepos / Manuel Antonio on what is known as “The Bumpy Road” or simply “The Road From Hell”. It is a roughly twenty five mile stretch of road that has eluded paving since Costa Rica’s inception, despite the fact that the highway north of it is smooth and wide, and the highway south is what us residents of this particular stretch like to call, (and quite modestly so I might add), the nicest highway in the country. Anymore with all the road improvements going on in the country thanks in large part to the current Arias administration, its probably not, but I think that we’ll just go ahead and keep bragging about our stretch of coastal highway.

Anyway, in order to sort of give a report on this stretch of road, which I get asked about quite a lot, and in order to delay the detailing of The Dumbest Thing I’ve Ever Done, I think I’ll go ahead and describe the drive. The Bumpy Road between Dominical and Quepos is in the best condition I’ve ever seen it. It took me about fifty minutes to travel its span, and it was, relatively speaking, smooth going. Please note that it pains my honesty-loving heart to use the word “smooth” in connection in any way with that road. But, I emphasize the qualifier “relatively” in deciding to use it. If you’ve ever driven that stretch of road, and have survived the drinking binge that resulted from it, you’ll know of the condition to which I refer. It is still amazingly bumpy, but relative to how it has been for the years that I have been in this country, it is a lot, well… less bumpy. It seems that they are actually improving the road and are getting it ready for paving. There are still a number of single lane bridges that are made up of railroad tracks running cross ways to form the driving surface. These bridges form a bottle neck that punctuate the drive with a number of slow downs and stops along the way but also provide an opportunity to purchase various road vendor snack foods as you wait. I subsisted on salted and dried plantain bananas washed them down with the wonderfully refreshing and healthy “pipa” or coconuts with a straw for drinking the juice. Some call that coconut milk but it's really not. The juice that is found housed inside of the hard exterior and nutty meat of the coconut is coconut juice, whereas coconut milk is something different. I think that is made from pulverizing the meat of the coconut, but really I’m not sure. Do I seem like I’m stalling?

Ok, let’s move north, up into Quepos. I always like to stop at the Café Milagro, which is found just before the one lane bridge as you’re leaving Quepos towards the north. It’s on the right hand side and is well worth the stop for the traumatized traveler who has just passed over the now “smooth” road from Dominical. Their coffee is great and the owner has great taste in décor. You definitely feel like you are in Costa Rica, but there is a wonderful “café” feel there that invites you to sit and relax, and perhaps chat with whomever you might be sitting with. I got a double espresso and then moved on my way. Oh, I should mention for the tobacco aficionado that there is a small shop just next door to Milagro café that sells Cuban cigars. I stopped in there just to smell the tobacco, which I love, but didn’t by any cigars, which I don’t care a lick for, but I’m sure they’re good, if you’re into that sort of thing. Ok, getting on with it.
Click here for Part II